Series: Home Improvement
Week 1: “Communicate and Listen”
The Word: Ephesians 4:24-29, Proverbs 12:18
Main Thought: The relationship is more important than winning the argument
We all have families that are unique and even dysfunctional right? Today, we are going to identify the importance of communication within the home.
Recap: Last week we learned that HONOR opens the door to relationship with our parents!
This week, the main thought is winning the relationship is more important than winning the argument. One of the important aspects of fighting FOR the relationship with our families is how we communicate.
How do we learn to communicate God’s way?
1. Surrender the right to be right.
Ephesians 4:24“Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.”
As a Christ-follower, we have a new nature. Our goal is to become more like Jesus. This is what it means to be “righteous” and “holy.” This verse is talking about being set apart for God and in a right relationship with God. This means that we should show our family this new person that we are in Christ.
2. Live truth by your words and actions.
Ephesians 4:25-28: So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body.
What are the different ways to lie?
- Calling in sick when we are not sick. - Flattering other people. Flattery means insincere praise. - Half-truths—not telling the whole story. - Exaggeration—adding extra to the story. - Cheating on a test…do you want that doctor standing over you with a scalpel that has cheated on all his tests? Satan is the father of lies. When we lie, it is satanic.
26 And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.”Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 for anger gives a foothold to the devil. 28 If you are a thief, quit stealing. Instead, use your hands for good hard work, and then give generously to others in need.
Anger is an emotion. God is angry with sin each day. Jesus even became angry in the temple when they turned it into the opposite of what it was meant to be. Jesus never sinned. But, don’t allow your emotions of anger become bitterness. At the end of the day, clear your conscience with those around you.
Social media: Ask yourself the question, “will what I’m about to write be something I regret once the feeling of anger goes away?”
3. Build up others with encouragement
Ephesians 4:29:“Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”
“Foul or Abusive” is Greek for "sapros" meaning: Bad, rotten, decayed; anything that injures or sparks dissentions of any kind.
Is it wrong just to curse? Is there more to it than 4-letter words? It is words that are a part of the “old self” before Jesus. If you struggle with abusive language, remember, “out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.” Matthew 12:34. If you don’t like what comes out of your mouth, listen carefully because you clean up from the inside out.
Will the words I say build others up or tear others them down?
Proverbs 12:18: “The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”
The real question is, “do I VALUE my family/relationships enough to show them?” Are we pouring the life of Jesus into others or draining them?
Romans 5:5: “Hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."
Pour out God’s love on those around you, especially your family. We all need home improvement in how we communicate. Because of Jesus pouring out his life for us on the cross, we can extend His love to others.
Element of Fun: We played a new version of "Family Feud." It was a lot of fun!
Music: You are Good, Your Love Never Fails, Cornerstone, Never Once,
Favorite Moment: Hearing about students sharing in small groups to begin communicating more like Jesus to others. We had three students who began a relationship with Jesus this week!
What’s Next: We finish the series, “Home Improvement” as we talk about the importance of forgiveness in the home.
To watch any of the series messages, check out the vimeo page