Leadership Tip: How to Respond to Criticism

If you are like me, you enjoy being around people who have a "can-do" encouraging attitude. My personality type and spiritual gifting goes well with others who don't whine and complain about everything in this world.

As a student pastor for the past 10 years, I have received a lot of feedback. Some criticism (at times it was what I needed) and some encouragement. I tend to remember more of the criticism than I do the encouragement. If you are reading this and you aren't a student pastor, you are a leader where God has placed you. I want to take a few minutes to share how I try to respond to encouragement and criticism as a leader. 

Responding to Criticism: 

1) Pray and ask God for wisdom. In the moment of frustration or hurt, always lean on God. My prayers have ranged from, "God, why are they saying this? Don't they see how wrong they are!" or "God, please help me respond with grace and truth." 

2) When you are criticized, thank the person for the feedback. By showing that you are secure in Christ and not defensive, it will help disarm the person from a debate or argument. As difficult as it can be to reveal that you value their input, it helps to build humility as a leader. Let them know your hope is to be as effective as you can for God's kingdom. 

3) Stand firm on God's leading. We should thank people for their input but that doesn't mean that we try to please every person with a critique. Follow God's direction as a leader and don't budge for each person with an opinion. Be humble and focus upon God's direction and blessings in every leadership decision. Don't expect people to change their opinions. If you are under authority of your boss/leader and they back you up, continue doing what God has called you to do for Him. 

4) Allow correction to change your character. Listening to someone's criticism or critique in a healthy, God-honoring way can help you grow. It helps us to be reminded that we are human and make mistakes. It helps us to rely on the Holy Spirit. Allow the tough times to mold you into the character of Jesus. 

5) Trust in God's defining love for you. Criticism doesn't need to define you. Jesus defines you. Keep your eyes fixed on His love for you despite what people say in and outside of the church. 

What tips do you have about responding to criticism? 

What I Learned on a Mission Trip

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Managua, Costa Rica 

If you are involved in any way with ministry, you probably have been on a mission trip at some point locally, nationally or internationally. I've been on plenty of mission trips doing construction, VBS and more. A lot of work goes into planning a mission trip, but every second is worth the eternal return of God working in and through each person that you encounter. 

As I think about this past week in Costa Rica with 40 from Church @ The Springs, my heart is full. God revealed to me once again that I need to continually love Him with all of my heart, soul, mind and strength. 

I learned that God is at work outside of America. Yes, it is true. To put it in perspective, the Costa Rican missionaries prayed for our group for a long time before we showed up at the airport. When we arrived, we weren't "bringing God" to them, but we were joining them in what God was already doing in their country! I am grateful to be an American. But when it comes to the kingdom of God, America is a blip on the radar of God's vision for the gospel. Jesus has called ALL of us in Matthew 28:19-20 to "Go and make disciples of all the nations..." 

I learned that this generation wants to make a difference in the world. I watched student-after-student share God's Word, share their testimonies, listen and pray for the Costa Rican children. Not one complained to me about serving all week. They were happy to do it. I listened as they worshipped together as they sang loud each evening. Some were on their knees praying for God to work. I watched them pray for one another. I truly believe that students are the church now and not the "future."

I learned that spending quality time with God matters more than "doing." I read my Bible and pray. I'm sure you do as well. As I spent MORE time doing that on the mission trip than I usually do in everyday life, it revealed to me how I must slow down. I journaled more and wrote out prayers. I stopped. I wasn't looking through my to-do list. I learned to allow my heart to open to God, and I prayed that I could continue this within the busyness of being a student pastor, husband and father of two children under two years old! 

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Selfie zip-lining in Costa Rica! 

An excerpt from my journal:  

"God thank you for humbling me and so many others this week. You are working in every heart and I pray that it will take root and last long beyond the trip. Help these students and adults continue to grow as leaders and to be on mission everyday. Help me to lead well and to stay close to you everyday and not get caught up in the the busyness of life. Pour out your love and power upon my life. Give me your passion to carry out your plan. Help me to be faithful and willing to do whatever it takes to make You famous. Break my heart for what breaks yours heart. Thank you for calling me and using me."

Gloria Dios! 

Moving a Mile Down the Road

Photo by: "Avoid Moving day Pitfalls"

We are moving in a few days to another rental home. We have been nice and comfy in our current rental for two years. We still own a house in Dothan, Alabama where we used to live. It is being rented out as the market is struggling in order to sell it. 

I have moved a lot in my life. As a child, we lived in 5 different states. I'm pretty fast at figuring out what needs to be packed. But, the older I get (I'm 30), I dislike it more and more. 

Moving reveals all of the clutter we have collected over the years. I'm amazed at how stuff piles up! We are using this opportunity to clean and donate items that we do not need. 

Moving reminds me of God's blessings. As I go through different rooms and organize items, I see old "thank-you" cards and pictures. It helps me be reminded of where God has brought my family and me. It helps me reflect on God's blessings in the past. 

Physical moving compares a lot to my spiritual heart. I want my heart to be movable and changeable to God. I want to always be willing in my heart for God to clear the clutter of the past. To be reminded that we are His children and this earthly dwelling is not our final home. 

The truth is, we are all passing through and the stuff I move this week (with the help of others) is not what life is all about. Life isn't truly about stuff, but all about relationships.