Stop and Start - Part 2

A blog series on how families can apply the gospel into their pain and dysfunction.

Part 2 - How to Set Priorities that Matter. How do you decide what is most important in your life? We all face decisions every day. Where will I eat lunch? Do I want to go to church? Will I accept that Facebook friend invite?

One major issue in today's families is the lack of priority in what eternally matters. I say that because many students live stressful, packed schedules. Many times the last place on their priority list is their spiritual growth. Sports, dance, academics and more are the main priorities.

The Bible does not give a step-by-step checklist to follow. It does provide principles that are applicable to how we make wise decisions with our lives. According to God, below are the priorities that matter most:

#1 God

#2 Spouse 

#3 Children 

 #4 Everything Else. This is where it gets messy.

 Paul talks more about what matter most in life! 

I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with him. I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God’s way of making us right with himself depends on faith. I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead. I want to suffer with him, sharing in his death, so that one way or another I will experience the resurrection from the dead! Philippians 3:7-14

The apostle Paul talks about putting excessive value on things. The creation becomes worshipped more than the Creator. The world considers these valuable, but to God it's just earthly things. In fact, its just MANURE compared to knowing Christ! The greek word in v. 8 is translated as “rubbish” is actually the word for poop!

The Philippians were the most supportive church of Paul’s missionary work. The Church at Philippi was undergoing persecution for a while and now Paul is in prison writing this letter to them. Paul writes to encourage them. Paul referred to Christ’ persecutions and His faithfulness. Everything we call great in this world is nothing compared to knowing Jesus.

 According to Paul, here is what matters most in life: 

• Pressing on to being more like Christ

• Forget past mistakes. God has forgiven you.

• Press onto God’s specific purpose for your life. 

 Jesus is not just a priority in the family. Stop viewing God as a part of your life. Instead start viewing God AS your life. The heart response is that Jesus is not just a priority but He is the center of our lives. When we simply "put" Jesus first, it can turn into a checklist that we follow. Slowly, we put God into a box that we create.

A few questions to consider:  

- What sort of things would be hardest for you to give up? - Imagine a manure-meter that lets you score your progress as you learn to live Phil. 3:8, as you learn to value the things of the world. What would be your score of one to ten? (10 being “I counted everything as loss” and 1 being “Well, there’s something about manure that I like.”) Why would you score yourself that way? - Ask Christ to help you focus on Him and not on the things of this world

How do we have a strong nation? We have strong churches who love Jesus. How do we have strong churches? We have strong families that love Jesus. How do we have strong families? We have strong marriages that are the foundation for generations to come. How do we build strong marriages? Individuals who love Jesus more than anything in this world. What would you add about family priorities? How do we decide on setting priorities in our family? 

Stop and Start - Part 1

A blog series on how families can apply the gospel into their pain and dysfunction.

Statistics on the American Family -Nuclear families have dropped to below 25% of all households. - The number of single dads grew 70%, and the number of households headed by single moms grew 25% in the last decade. - Every thirty minutes in America – 29 kids will attempt suicide, 2,795 teenage girls will become pregnant, and 22 girls will get abortions. - Studies reveal that 85% of the people who make a commitment to Jesus Christ make the decision by the age of 18, or they never will.

Part 1: The Blame Game 

"Why did you not do what I asked you?" He said. She responded, "I didn't feel like it and plus, I am tired." He reacts, "But you told me you were going to do it and now it is ALL your fault."

The blame game. We are all infected with it. It started back in the Garden of Eden. It is everywhere and probably rears its ugly head in your family as it can in mine. Each family has its own background and history with their own specific problems. Some families are extremely verbal while others are quiet. The starting blocks for healthy relationships is vertical before it is horizontal. I do not believe there is a quick fix to family problems. My purpose in writing this series is to establish some biblical truths that can be applied to relationships in the family.

We all come from families with different types of dysfunction. My church has started a series on the family ("Modern Family"). Lately, I have thought about some of the normal dysfunctions that families face and what God's Word has to say about it.

The first family killer is the "blame game."We have all seen this happen in a conversation. Usually blaming happens after someone has made a mistake. The definition of blame is, "to find fault with; to hold responsible, to place responsibility for."

At the heart of man's sinful nature is the desire to stay out of trouble at all costs. We want to look better than others (pride) and do not mind putting others down if it helps us (accusing).

Jesus said, “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye." Matthew 7:3-5

How to STOP playing the blame the game and START establishing humility in the home:

Give yourself credit (Matthew 7:3-5)

We are responsible for our own actions. Parents who make mistakes in their past affect the future of their children. Every parent makes mistakes. But it is their mistake. One of the top responses I get from students is that they feel pressure that they caused their families pain. God's grace is sufficient to carry the weight of any families burden. Restoration is fulfilled when hurting people find their hope and truth in Jesus.

Renew your past with truth. (Romans 12:1-2)

It is vital to replace the old attitude and habits with a new clarity. Families that continually blame each other reveals the need for humility. It is going back to the foot of the cross and seeing yourself in need of a Savior. The brutal truth is the only way to renew your past and forgive yourself and others.

Give life by your words. (Proverbs 16:24) The power of life is our words. Word can shape a person's identity, especially children and students. Blaming is the opposite of giving life. It is giving death to resolving any situation.

Examples of life giving words: - "I know God has shaped you in specific way for His purposes!" - "God has unconditional love for you, no matter what." - "You are uniquely made by God!" (Psalm 139) - "Our family would not be the same without you, you are so important!"

Try to stop blaming and start giving life to each other. Who knows, the blame game might just become a faint memory.

What are your thoughts on the "blame game?" What would you add to the "stop and start" list?  

4 Years.

4 years ago today, my brother Jordan went to be with Jesus. I miss him a lot. My brothers Justin and Jeff are on a mission trip right now overseas as I'm typing. Justin shared an awesome story of remembering Jordan today in Germany!

My brother Jordan died 4 years ago, today… freaking August 19th, 2008. I spent this day in Germany with my brother Jeff and our wonderful German friends. After flying down the autobahn, amazing German food, fellowship & church, we went to the river Rhein to swim and run the speedo patrol. :)

People from all over the world were at the river and little waves were made by huge boats that passed by about every 2 minutes. At a certain point during the fun I came out of the water and heard a massive honking noise from a boat and when I turned to look I saw the name "Jordan" on the front of the boat/ship. I froze. Toby, my German comrade started yelling at me "Look Justin, Jordan!" as I nodded and looked back at the boat, i watched it go by in what felt like slow motion. Tons of boats had passed by that day but this was the only one that honked. It resounded like a sound effect with the bass kicking deep in the water. The only sound I heard was the horn, no water, no German, no talking.

Many moments in my life feel like scenes from a movie (granted I see everything as a movie) but dang, this was. With water dripping from my eyes and rocks beneath my feet, I watched the boat pass. I noticed that the name "Jordan" was not only on the front but on each side of the back with a German name in between. The boat finally went out of focus and I just sat in the water looking up at the sky, "Whoa." Now, understand that Jordan's on my mind everyday... all the time… not just the 19th. Sometimes I meet people and that don't have a clue that I have a brother named Jordan and when they forget my name, they call me Jordan. This happens all the time and it's always interesting how that's even possible.

Above all the places to hear or see the name Jordan, it's plastered in all CAPS on a boat… at the river Rhein… in Germany... on August 19th. Insane. If i was an atheist, i would've become a christian today haha! My whole body was flooded with joy and peace. This was a blessing from my King today.

After the Rhein, Jeff, wilhelm and I went to a birthday party for an in-law of my favorite german family, the martens. It was Mexican for dinner and Mr. Bean was on tv in the other room, which brought my heart gladness. After speaking some broken German and Russian, I got to witness the love of Jesus in a loving family. So much joy, so much love and so much laughter was shared. As I filmed, I witnessed something really amazing. One of my favorite things to see is brothers hanging together and families just doing life together. I had a front row seat. What a day.

My heart is still shattered and always will be but through the midst of pain, a tiny little seed of joy lives. Only because of Jesus, that seed exists. Jordans life will not become a piece of dust on a picture mistaken as a memory. I carry everything Jordan was in me, I live 2 lives of purpose. For my hero, Jordan Robinson.

I just wanted to share this moment with you. Thanks for reading."

To go to the facebook link, click HERE.

I'm grateful for Justin's story of how God reveals His love. As I am remembering Jordan's life, I am looking forward to meeting Micah JORDAN Robinson soon. I look forward to telling him stories about his amazing uncle Jordan. But most importantly, I want to tell Micah about the life that Jordan lived for Christ.